We need to remind ourselves that Liam had no clue what Disney was "really". He knew there was a castle, and he knew the characters, but he had no idea about the rides, the crowds, the parades, the waiting, and the rest of what a vacation to disney on New Years eve would bring.
We need to remind ourselves that his experiences in family life, for however long he was with his birthfamily, were different. We need to remind ourselves that he has not had anyone focus on just him in a very long time and I'm sure that can be overwhelming. We need to remember that he has seen things on tv that kids his age should not have seen and sometimes his reactions are based on how he "thinks" he should react based on what he's seen in movies.
When we looked back at the times that have been the hardest for Liam, they each centered around vacation and fun. Our vacation to the Cape brought on a reaction that surprised me. He refused to get into our annual family photo, standing on the beach screaming that he was bad. THe night before we left for Hawaii he had a meltdown and stood, refusing to move for hours. We figured it was all the excitement getting the best of him. Packing, making lists, getting backpacks, activities, etc all done before leaving was overwhelming and we assumed that was the cause of it. Now this... He had a major meltdown over something we perceived as trivial, but he did not. He told me I was not his mother, he didnt want me... It was hard to hear, but I didn't go into this with rose colored glasses. I know that trauma rears its ugly head at the most inopportune times. I dont know if he feels guilty for having fun, if he fears getting lost or something else... I'll be honest, the crowds were so huge, I was afraid that I would get lost myself... For a kid who got lost once and ended up in an orphanage, I'm sure this is sitting out there in his subconscious. Add to that the excitement of Disney, the characters, the photos, the rides, the barrage of sensory stimuli and it's a disasaster waiting to happen. After a long day of being angry at the world, he settled down, and had a great time the rest of the days we were there. We will be laying low for the next few months. The only trip planned is to a water park with Rich, while Brit and I are in Paris. I have a feeling all will go well, since I wont be there. I am the target of his frustration for some reason. I am hoping it's because he feels safe and comfortable enough to do that. Time will tell.
New Years Eve!!
The fireworks are breathtaking and surround us.
Liam getting his tribal dragon face painting. He was very impressed with the artists skills
Osborne Spectacle of dancing lights






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